


RANDOM ACTS OF VIOLENCE

by ksstarfire



Category: Starsky & Hutch
Genre: Angst, Gen, h/c
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-13
Updated: 2016-09-29
Packaged: 2018-08-08 12:32:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7757998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ksstarfire/pseuds/ksstarfire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A madman uses Hutch as extra credit toward his goal. Starsky is an unwilling witness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This one is for ChocolateEgg who loves to see Hutch hurt.  
> Hope SpartaCon is amazing this weekend!

“Move and your partner’s dead.”

Hutch froze in the doorway, his gun in his hand, as he saw Starsky. He was standing in front of a pole with his arms behind him. He had a very long wicked-looking knife held against his throat and a gag in his mouth. The man holding the knife was standing behind him and was sheltered by Starsky’s body. His fist was gripping a handful of Starsky’s dark hair, holding his head back. As Hutch stood there and watched Starsky swallowed, causing the knife to make a shallow cut to his throat. Hutch stared, horrified, as blood welled and a thin stream traveled down his throat.

He looked up to find Starsky’s eyes were locked on his.

“Drop your gun Hutchinson.”

Hutch stood there watching as the man pulled Starsky’s head back further and the edge of the knife pressed in a little deeper.

“I won’t ask again.”

Realizing he had no choice, Hutch dropped his gun by his feet.

“Kick it away from you, to the right.”

Hutch did as he was told.

“Move over to the left. Take out your cuffs and cuff your right wrist. Toss the other cuff over that pole.” He indicated a pole running from one support beam to the next. “Cuff your left wrist.”

The man never let up on his grip of Starsky’s hair. Nor did he move the knife away from Starsky’s neck.

It took Hutch a couple tries to fasten the other cuff. He turned his gaze back to his partner’s.

“Starsk?”

“Shut up! I didn’t tell you that you could talk!.”

Starsky kept his eyes on Hutch’s. Questions were asked of each other but neither knew any answers or saw any way out at this time.

The man released his hold on Starsky’s hair and removed the knife from his neck. “Good to see you followed my directions, Hutchinson. I trust you came alone and didn’t let anyone know where you were heading?”

“I did just what you said. No one knows where I am. Now let Starsky go!”

Starsky’s eyes had followed the man and now they darted back to Hutch’s and he tried to talk through the gag. He shook his head ‘no’.

“Not just yet I’m thinking.”

“Look, you said you’d let Starsky go if I followed your instructions!”

“I may have lied.” The man shrugged and began to laugh loudly. He walked behind Hutch and gagged him. Then he walked out of the room, shutting off the lights as he left. There were no windows in the room so the partners were plunged into total darkness.

Neither one knew how long they had been in the darkness.

Attempts to talk around the gags weren’t successful. They each took some comfort knowing they were together but both guessed this wasn’t going to end well.

Starsky slid down the pole he was cuffed to and sat on the floor. Even though he felt bad that Hutch was left standing, he thought to conserve his strength in case he had a chance to save himself and Hutch. Before the lights had gone out he had seen the strain on Hutch’s shoulders from being cuffed to the overhead pipe. But he was helpless to do anything about it.

The door banging open sometime later roused them. Blinking their eyes at the brightness of the lights coming on they watched their captor walk into the room. 

Starsky managed to use his legs to push himself back to a standing position.

They both looked at the man but neither recognized him. He stood almost as tall as Hutch, a few inches taller than Starsky. He was big and muscular. His eyes and hair were brown. He wore black jeans and a black long-sleeved shirt.

He rolled a small cart over by Hutch and pulled a cover off the top of it. Both men looked at the assortment of items on top of the cart. He picked up a knife similar to the one he had held to Starsky’s neck. Moving in front of Hutch he began to cut the buttons off Hutch’s shirt.

Glancing at Hutch he said, “I may have misjudged just how long your arms were. You weren’t supposed to be able to touch the floor with your feet. ”He frowned then smiled. “But this might work out better!” He laughed again.

“I would advise you to stand very still. All my knives are razor-sharp and I would hate to cut you… before I mean to that is.”

He pulled the shirt out of Hutch’s jeans to get to the bottom buttons. The man put the knife down and picked up a large pair of scissors and cut Hutch’s jacket and shirt off of him. He unbuckled Hutch’s belt and pulled it loose from his jeans then used the scissors to cut the jeans off him. Hutch was left standing with his underwear, socks and shoes on.

“Now Starsky, if you haven’t ever seen your partner naked, I would suggest you close your eyes.” He laughed as he picked the knife up again and slid the blade inside Hutch’s underwear. With two quick slashing motions he sliced each side of the underwear and watched it fall to the floor.

Hutch turned his head to the side and buried his face in his arm. They had seen each other naked before, but not like this. He felt the pull of Starsky’s eyes and turned his head back to look at his partner.

Starsky kept his eyes glued to Hutch’s. He pulled at the cuffs securing him to the pole but only succeeded in making the metal cut into his wrists. He stopped struggling when he saw Hutch shake his head ‘no’

The man tugged the gag off Hutch, pulling hair out as he did. Hutch flinched but made no sound. He tried to wet his mouth with saliva as he watched their captor pull on a pair of padded gloves, smaller than those used by boxers. He walked in front of Hutch and smiled as he threw a quick punch to Hutch’s midsection.

The blow raised Hutch off his feet, jarring him both from the punch and the shock of his feet landing back on the floor. He clamped his lips together to keep from yelling at the pain.

“Trying to be tough Hutchinson?” He smirked as he proceeded to punch Hutch time and time again. He landed one particularly hard punch to Hutch’s left side. Hutch yelled out as he both felt and heard at least one of his ribs break.

A smile crossed the man’s face. “Ah, so you are capable of making noise when hurt.” Without warning he swung his right hand into Hutch’s left side again. This time the force of the blow twisted Hutch’s body and he screamed as his left shoulder was dislocated. He continued to yell as he was struck over and over.

Starsky tried to scream at the man through his gag. He began tugging on the cuffs again, trying to get loose.

Blows continued to strike Hutch as the man moved around him and punched time and time again. The thud of each blow striking Hutch went straight through Starsky. Seeing his partner being beaten, tortured, without being able to stop it or help him was torture on him as well. Colorful bruises were popping up all over Hutch’s body.

The man stopped hitting Hutch when he realized Hutch had stopped screaming. He looked up to see he had passed out. He stepped back and wiped the sweat off his face. “That was a good workout! I feel great!” He turned and smiled at Starsky.

“Hutchinson makes a wonderful sparring partner.”

He pulled off the gloves and with one last look at Hutch hanging there, walked out of the room, turning the lights off as he went.

“Nhhh!” Starsky screamed through his gag. “’Utchh” he tried to yell. He began trying to dislodge the gag by rubbing his face against his shoulder. He heard small moans from his partner as Hutch breathed in an out.

Starsky was finally able to work the gag off. “Hutch?” He whispered because he didn’t know if the man had the room wired for sound. “Hey! Hutch, can you hear me?”  


There was no answer.

Starsky closed his eyes to keep from shedding tears. He began to say prayers he thought he had forgotten a long time ago. His heart ached for what Hutch had gone through. His mind kept going back to that table standing so close to his partner. The table with the knives and other items on it. He shuddered and strained his eyes trying to see through the darkness to Hutch.

At some point, he fell asleep, sliding down the pole to the floor.

Hutch roused to darkness. The pain from his shoulder and his ribs was worse than even when he had been shot before.

“Starsk?” His voice was raspy from his screams and from being dry. He tried again. “Starsk?” This time he coughed and the jolt shot pain through his broken ribs. His eyes closed as he started to lose consciousness again. Before his mind shut down, he was mortified to feel himself lose control of his bladder. Tears fell down his cheeks even as the urine ran down his legs.

When the lights came on again Starsky looked at Hutch who seemed to still be unconscious. He pushed himself up again. He saw Hutch’s socks were stained yellow and knew Hutch had lost control of his bladder. He hurt for his partner’s embarrassment.

“Who are you and what do you want?”

“We’ll get to who I am later. As for what I want… I want to hurt your partner, Hutchinson. I want to see what it takes to make him scream. I want to see what it takes to make him beg.” 

“Wh… why?”

Starsky looked at Hutch to see his eyes open. He was panting and sweating. He was trying to relieve the pressure on his left shoulder and ribs.  


“Why… you doin’… this?”

“Because I can.”

The men watched as their captor walked over to the cart. He picked up a short whip.

“Ah yes, I think I will start with this one.”

Without warning he slashed the whip across Hutch’s chest twice. Hutch started to yell but bit it back as he saw Starsky’s eyes widen in horror. The whip slashed across his stomach twice and still Hutch kept his screams inside of himself.

“Stubborn aren’t you?” The whip slashed across Hutch’s thighs. “I want to make you scream in pain.” Slash. “I want you to hurt more than you have ever hurt before…” Slash. Slash.

“You’re going to beg me to stop before I’m done, Hutchinson. I promise you that.” He stepped back and swung the whip across Hutch’s genitals.

Hutch bit his lower lip to keep from screaming but couldn’t stop himself as the pain from that strike overwhelmed him. Blood ran from his lip at the same time blood oozed from the lash mark on his penis. He turned his face back into his arm but not before he saw a tear run down the side of Starsky’s face.

Starsky tried to keep any more tears from falling. He knew Hutch was trying to be strong for him. He knew he needed to be strong for Hutch too. “Stop! Leave him alone! Why don’t you turn me lose and fight like a real man?”

“Ahhh, there’s that loyalty I’ve read about. That willingness to sacrifice yourself for each other.” He turned back toward Hutch. “What do you think Hutchinson? Should I let Starsky take your place?”

“Nooo… No, Starsk. Don’t.”

“Oh, isn’t that sweet? Well then Hutchinson, where were we?” He walked behind Hutch and began to use the whip on his back, buttocks and thighs.

Starsky kept yelling at him to stop until he realized that his screaming was making the man whip Hutch more. He bit his lips and forced himself to stay silent. He saw blood start to run down Hutch’s legs and drop on the floor. Hutch had been moaning, but was quiet now. Starsky looked up to see that Hutch had passed out again. He closed his eyes and felt more tears run down his face.

The man came back around Hutch. “So you took refuge in darkness again, huh?” The man laughed as he exited the room again. This time he left the lights on.

About an hour later, Starsky heard Hutch moan. He looked over at him and saw his eyes were open a bit. “Hutch?”

“Yeh. He… gone?”

“For now. You don’t look so good.”

“Don… feel so… good. Not gon… make it... Stars. Broke… insi… de.”

“No! Don’t talk like that! You WILL make it!”

“Lung… hurt. Ha’ to… you out… here.”

“I’m not leaving you Hutch!”

“Ha’ to. Before... knife" Hutch gathered his strength to try to make his partner leave and save himself. “Get… help. For… me. Please?”

“How?” Starsky started to say more, but stopped when Hutch started speaking again.

“Ha’ plan.” Slowly, painfully, Hutch outlined his plan. He hoped he would be able to pull off his part in it. “On..ly ch…chan... Please?”

Starsky thought about what Hutch had said. It might work, If Hutch had the strength left. “Ok, buddy. When he comes back in we’ll try it. Try to get some rest.”

“Love… Starsy… love…” Hutch closed his eyes and drifted.

“Love you too Hutch.” Starsky closed his eyes and concentrated on Hutch’s plan. 

It could all go so very wrong.

When the door opened again Starsky started yelling. “Why did you have to kill him? Who are you and why did you kill him?” He was screaming for all he was worth.

The man quickly turned to Hutch who was holding his breath and letting his weight hang from the cuffs, despite the pain this caused in his shoulder. He walked over to stand in front of Hutch.

Starsky quickly started yelling again. “What did he ever do to you? What did WE ever do to you?”

“I like to study how people handle pain. What can they take? Does it make a difference if someone they love is there? I’ve been reading about the two of you in the papers. Your partner was an excellent subject. I have written pages and pages about him. I only hope you prove to be just as good a subject.”

He turned to Hutch and unlocked the handcuffs. He didn’t bother to watch as Hutch fell, instead he turned toward Starsky. “Let’s get you started, shall we?”  


Starsky watched Hutch fall to his right side. He kept yelling at the man to cover any noise his partner might make.

Hutch pushed himself up on his hands and knees and gathered what strength he had left, then launched his body at the man. He caught him behind the knees and knocked him down. His head struck the concrete floor and Hutch quickly reached up and grabbed a fist full of the man’s hair and slammed his head onto the floor again. He started to slam it again but Starsky’s words stopped him.

“Hutch! Hutch, stop. Get the handcuff key. Hurry, un-cuff me.”

Starsky wasn’t sure how much longer Hutch would stay conscious and he wanted to be free to restrain the man before Hutch lost his battle to stay awake.

Hutch managed to push the man over and found the key underneath him. He took a moment to catch his breath and started dragging himself toward Starsky with his right arm.

“That’s it, Hutch. You can do it. Almost here.” Starsky moved himself around the post so Hutch wouldn’t have so far to go. He held his hands as far away from the post as he could. It took Hutch several tries but he finally got one of the cuffs unlocked.

Starsky unlocked the other one and quickly moved over to cuff their captor.

He moved back to Hutch and pulled him carefully onto his lap.

“Hey Hutch. You with me here? I have to see if I can find a phone. I gotta’ get you help.”

Hutch’s eyes were closed and his breathing labored. Starsky knew Hutch had used up energy he didn’t have while subduing their captor. He took off his jacket and wadded it up. He eased Hutch out of his lap and put the jacket under his head. He pulled off his shirt and covered Hutch’s naked body with it. Hutch didn’t respond or move.

“I’ll be right back. Hang in there.”

He was about to leave Hutch when he heard sirens. They were getting closer and closer. They stopped as he ran to the door and pulled it open. Captain Dobey was standing in the hallway with his gun in his hand. Behind him were several officers and bringing up the rear was Huggy.

“Cap’n? How? Never mind that! Hutch is hurt real bad. He needs an ambulance…” Starsky broke off as he saw a gurney being pushed down the hallway toward them.

“Get that man out of here!” Dobey indicated the cuffed man on the floor who was moaning. Two officers lifted him up and walked him out, reading him his rights as they went.

Starsky moved back to Hutch’s side. “He’s got some broken ribs and his left shoulder is dislocated. He was beaten and whipped. Please be careful with him.” He watched as the EMT’s carefully put a blanket around Hutch then slid him onto a spine board. They lifted him gently and put him on the gurney.

“Go with Hutch, Starsky. You need your wrists looked at. Huggy and I’ll catch up with you at the hospital. I need to be sure this place is searched completely.” 

Captain Dobey put his hand on Starsky’s shoulder. “We won’t be far behind you two.”

“Thanks Cap’n.”

Starsky followed the gurney out to the ambulance. He climbed in the back with Hutch. One of the EMTs reached for his wrists, but Starsky pulled back. “Take care of Hutch first. He said he thought something broke inside him. Just take care of him. Please?”

Both EMTs were working on Hutch. They started an IV and placed oxygen and a heart monitor on him. “He’s pretty dry, run that IV wide open, I’m going to try to start another one.” They radioed into the ER to let them know what Hutch’s injuries were.

Starsky kept a hand on Hutch’s leg. His partner was covered in bruises and cuts. What skin wasn’t bruised or cut was pale. His breathing was very shallow. He could see Hutch wince when one of the EMTs touched a tender spot. The blanket they had wrapped Hutch in was turning red in spots from all the blood Hutch was losing.  


One of the EMTs radioed that Hutch was going to need blood, as well as the IV fluids.

“His blood type is B positive.” Starsky said. “Have the ER doc call Metro and ask for volunteers to donate blood. There’s several there with B positive type.”

They relayed the information.

“Memorial this is unit one enroute. Patient is showing PVCs please advise.”

“What? What’s a PVC? What’s happening?” Starsky heard a voice on the radio relaying orders for meds and watched as the EMTs started injecting something into one of Hutch’s IVs.

“His heart beat is becoming irregular. We’re giving him meds to slow and strengthen it. Does he have family here?”

“Just me ‘n Captain Dobey. And our friend Huggy. His family lives in Minnesota.”

“I think you might want to call them when we get to Memorial, just in case.”

Starsky tightened his hand on Hutch’s ankle. He whispered to Hutch. “Hang on. You gotta hang on.”

When they arrived at Memorial, Hutch was immediately surrounded by doctors and nurses. Starsky tried to stay as close to him as he could. A nurse took his arm and tried to stear him to another ER room to have his wrists looked at but he pulled away and followed the group into Hutch’s room.

One of the doctors came over and asked Starsky what happened. Starsky told him about Hutch being beaten and whipped. He explained how his shoulder had been dislocated. The doctor told him Hutch seemed to be stable at the moment and asked one of the nurses to take Starsky and have his own wounds tended to.

As he walked out of Hutch’s room Captain Dobey and Huggy showed up. They followed him into another room and Starsky explained again what had happened.

“How did you find us Cap’n?”

“You can thank Huggy for that. When I couldn’t find either of you and your car was still at your place I called Huggy. He found a few drops of blood in your living room.”

“Yeah the guy surprised me and hit me over the head with something.”

“The crime lab couldn’t find any clues at your house so Huggy went to Hutch’s. He didn’t find anything out of place but saw a pad and pen sitting by the phone. He used a pencil and rubbed over the indentions in the paper and found the address.”

“Thanks Hug. We owe you.”

“Just pay up your bar tab my man.” Huggy chuckled.

The nurse finished cleaning up the deep cuts on Starsky’s wrists. She called one of the ER doctors in to look at them. He gave Starsky a script for some antibiotics and told him to keep them clean and dressed.

As the doctor was finishing up a page came over the speaker in the hallway. “Code Blue ER one. Code Blue ER one.”

Starsky jumped off the table and ran, yelling over his shoulder that that was the room Hutch was in.

He squeezed into the room when another doctor ran in. Huggy and Captain Dobey right on his heels. They saw the ER staff frantically working on Hutch. They were doing CPR and injecting medications into his IV lines. The heart monitor was emitting a steady whine.

“Hutch. Hutch. Hutch. Hutch.” He wasn’t aware that he was chanting Hutch’s name until Huggy put a hand on his shoulder. He continued to chant, only doing it silently.

Something, some movement made Starsky suddenly look at the head of Hutch’s bed. Hutch was standing there, looking down. Only Starsky could see THROUGH him. Hutch seemed to be watching what the ER staff was doing to his body.

As Starsky watched, the standing-Hutch began to take on a translucent golden glow. There was no sign of hurt or pain on his face… just peace.

“No. No. NO!” Dobey and Huggy looked at him. “Stop him!”

“Starsky, they’re trying to save Hutch. Why do you want them to stop?” Dobey asked.

“Don’t you see him?” Starsky pointed to where Hutch continued to look down and glow even brighter.

“Hutch! Hutch is leaving! Can’t you see him?”

Huggy and Dobey looked at each other worriedly and tried to get Starsky to leave the room with them. He shook off their hands.

He pointed again toward the back of the ER room. Tears were flowing down his face. “NOOOOOOOOOOOO!” He screamed and fell to his knees on the floor. 

“Don’t leave me Hutch! Please?”

Just then the standing-Hutch looked away from his body and over to where Starsky was kneeling on the floor. His ice blue eyes darkened and the frown lines between his brows, which had disappeared, were there again. His mouth formed a word, ‘Starsk’?

Captain Dobey and Huggy both looked where Starsky was looking and what they saw staggered them both. There was a golden glow coming from beyond the head of the gurney.

“Please don’t leave me Hutch.” Starsky whispered it as a prayer.

The heart monitor which had continued sounding with a steady whine suddenly beeped. Then again. And again. Again. Until it was issuing a steady stream of beeps.  


The medical staff stood looking at each other as if they couldn’t believe what was happening. One of the doctors started snapping out orders and that brief moment of utter silence, save for the beeping of the heart monitor, was shattered.

As the three men watched, that golden glow slowly settled over Hutch’s body and then seemed to be absorbed into it. Dobey and Huggy barely had time to catch Starsky as he swayed and started to fall over.

****** 

“We found notebook after notebook in his house detailing how he had captured and tortured others. Including where he buried the bodies. He is, or was, a professor of psychology at the university. His area of study was in torture and how people reacted to it. He told the judge at his arraignment that he was working on a book. That he NEEDED subjects so he could prove his theory. His attorney is trying to get him to plead insanity.” Captain Dobey shook his head as he told both detectives what they had found when they searched the man’s house.

“The University had launched a quiet investigation earlier this year when twin brothers taking his class had gone missing. We found their notebooks.”  
Captain Dobey paused for a few seconds. 

“We also found Hutch's.” He looked at the blond detective, worried how he would take this information.

“It’s ok, Cap’n. It’s more evidence that will put him away for life.” Hutch nodded. 

Starsky looked at his partner and decided it was time to send their captain on his way. He cleared his throat and gave a quick nod to Dobey who realized that Hutch was fading quickly. He stood up and walked over by Hutch’s bed.

“You need to get some rest, Hutch. I’ve got both of your statements, so you take it easy. Starsky, I’m trusting you to keep an eye on him.”

Starsky saluted with one of his bandaged arms. “Aye, aye, Sir!”

Dobey walked toward the door, stopping before walking out of it. As he looked back at his two best detectives, and adopted ‘sons’ he gave up a quick prayer of thanksgiving. He left as he saw Starsky get out of his hospital bed and go sit on the side of Hutch’s. Starsky had been glued to Hutch’s side since whatever had happened in that ER room had happened. 

“Starsk? Why do you keep looking at me like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like I’m an alien or something?”

“Well, Hutch, there’s something I didn’t tell you.”

“You’re hurt worse? Did that bastard get to you? I’m sorry I… I…passed out and…”

“No, no, buddy. I’m ok. You got him before he could hurt me.”

“Then what?”

“Your heart stopped. When they got you here to the hospital. In the ER. Your heart stopped.”

“You must have jump-started it with your Torino, because I’m still here.” Hutch chuckled but he kept getting… glimpses of… something… he wasn’t sure of what but he knew it was important. And it involved the man sitting on the side of his bed.

“You died, Hutch. And I saw…” Starsky paused to steady himself. “I saw ‘you’ standing and looking down at your body. But ‘you’ were… well you were glowing… and I could see through you.” Starsky waited for Hutch to laugh at him. 

Instead Hutch reached out and pulled Starsky down to hug him. He took a deep breath, so many things becoming clear suddenly. He held Starsky’s head on his shoulder and turned his head. He put his mouth close to Starsky’s ear and whispered, “I won’t leave you. I’m here and I won’t leave you. Promise.”


	2. WHO'S HEALING WHO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I felt like this needed... more.... so here is more.

Starsky eased himself down on the bed on Hutch’s right side. He carefully slid his arm under Hutch’s shoulders and gently pulled him close so his upper body was resting on Starsky’s chest.

“You better be tellin’ the truth buddy. ‘Cause I’m gonna’ hold you to that.” He leaned his head down and rested it against Hutch’s. He wanted to pull his partner close and hold him fiercely tight, but knew that would cause him too much pain right now, so he settled for just holding him against his body. He let out the breath he seemed to have been holding forever, finally relaxing a little.

“Promise ya, Babe. As long as you make the same promise to me.”

“It’s a deal.” Starsky felt Hutch’s body relax into his. Felt his breathing slow and all the tension release as the pain medication the nurse had given him kicked in.

It felt so good to hold Hutch like this. To know he was safe in his arms. Starsky still saw Hutch standing naked, being tortured. But right now he knew Hutch was alive and safe. And he would make sure he stayed that way.

Starsky’s eyes slowly closed and his head came to rest against Hutch’s as his own body succumbed to the pain meds he had been given and to the peace being so close to his best friend fostered in him.

A few minutes later, one of their nurses opened the door and looked in on them. She smiled as she quietly closed the door and put a do not disturb sign on the outside of it. She figured they needed their rest and healing time more than they needed her to wake them for a set of vital signs.

***** 

The next few days followed the same pattern of brief periods of wakefulness followed by long intervals of sleep. That the times of sleep were usually accomplished with the two of them in the same bed was a given and hardly raised an eyebrow among the nurses and doctors caring for them. Huggy and Dobey would see them sleeping securely in each other’s arms and leave them a note that they would stop in later.

Hutch’s shoulder had been repaired without surgery. His wounds from the whip were healing well and the deep bruises were starting to fade. He still had a catheter in until the cut on his penis healed more. And until he regained his strength so he could stand for longer periods of time.

Starsky helped him stand and walk short distances in the room every day. He encouraged and cajoled and ordered Hutch to get out of the bed and move despite the pain. Starsky’s wrists were healing as well, and his doctor didn’t think he would have any lasting nerve damage..

One morning, Starsky slipped out of Hutch’s bed without waking him. He stood by the bed and watched Hutch sleeping. He closed his eyes, trying to keep tears from falling. When he felt the first tear run down his cheek and fall on his chest he turned away from the bed and walked over to stand by the window.

The sun was coming up and painting the thin wispy clouds pink against the pale blue of the sky. The blue reminded him of Hutch’s eyes. A rich, pure blue... that could have been closed forever. Lost to him forever. Because of him.

That sadistic bastard had gotten hold of Hutch because he hadn’t been paying attention when he had entered his house. He had used Starsky to lure Hutch into his trap. And then he had tortured and almost killed him.

Despite his best efforts, a quiet sob escaped him as he leaned against the window frame and let his tears fall. He could have lost his best friend. He could have lost him forever. He didn’t deserve to be here with him.

He didn’t realize he had been sobbing and whispering out loud until strong arms came around him from behind. Hutch pulled him back against his chest and stood there rocking him back and forth. He opened his eyes and saw them reflected in the window. His beautiful Hutch, standing behind him with his arms wrapped tight against him. Hutch had hung the catheter bag on the pocket of his robe so he could walk over to him.

“Hey... hey... stop crying Babe. It wasn’t your fault. I don’t blame you at all.” He turned Starsky around and pulled him into a tight hug. “You saved my life. You got help for me in time.”

“No... that man... he... he... would have killed you. And it… it would have been my... my fault.”

“It would have been his fault, Starsk. Not yours.”

“I hated... watching... you wouldn’t yell... because of me. You were... were... trying to protect me. And I... I couldn’t do anything to help you Hutch.”

“You were strong too, Starsk. Your strength gave me strength. I knew if I didn’t hang on he would start on you. I couldn’t let that happen.”

“Hutch...”

“Shhhh. Let’s go lay back down, I’m feelin’ a little wobbly.” Hutch didn’t feel at all upset at this small manipulation of his partner.

Starsky immediately put his arms around Hutch to help him back to the bed. He felt guilty for making him get out of bed in the first place.

“Starsk. Stop it.”

“What?”

“Stop feeling guilty about everything. We both made it. We’re together. That’s all that matters.” He leaned his forehead against Starsky’s. “Now help me get back into bed.”

Starsky did then turned to get into his own bed.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“Well, I thought...”

“That was your first mistake Gordo. Get over here where you belong.”

When Starsky hesitated, Hutch held out his hand toward him. “I need you close to me. Please?” Again he didn’t feel a bit of guilt. All he wanted was to be able to help heal his partner’s psyche and soul as his partner was trying to heal his. 

Starsky turned and climbed into the bed with his partner. Hutch put his head on Starsky’s chest and pulled him close. “This is where you belong. Right here with me. And don’t you ever forget it.” With that said Hutch closed his eyes and fell asleep on Starsky’s chest.

Combing his fingers lightly through Hutch’s blond hair Starsky was so thankful that he was alive. He leaned his head down and kissed him on the forehead. “This is where we both belong, Blondie. This... now... is where we start our lives over again.”

And as they slept arm in arm, heads touching, hearts beating in tandem and breaths mixing together… both healed in body… but mostly they healed in spirit.


End file.
